Interactive graph
Listen Before Fixing
Table of Contents
Listen before fixing = I let the other person finish before I hand them advice, correction, or a solution. I repeat what I heard in my own words, then respond. Feeling heard comes before being helped.
Examples
- Sports: A younger player kept explaining why he missed the free throw - I almost jumped in with form tips. I waited, said back what he thought went wrong, then offered one drill.
- Non-technical work: A nurse vented about a scheduling mix-up - I didn't open with “just tell admin.” I mirrored the problem, then asked what she wanted done about it.
- Home with children: My kid told me about a fight at school - I caught myself lining up a lecture and stopped. “So he took your pencil and you pushed him” - then we talked about what to try tomorrow.
- Real world: A friend called about a job mess - I didn't pitch my résumé tips until she'd finished the story and I checked I had it right.
Note Relationships
| Relationship | Wikilink | Reason |
|---|---|---|
| contradicts | Safety Comes First | when waiting to hear more would let harm continue |
| extends | Follow Their Lead | Listening is how I stay in their world before I steer |
| extends | The Golden Rule | I'd want someone to hear me out before they fixed me |
| implements | Emotional Regulation | I hold the urge to interrupt with the answer |
| implements | Emotional Regulation | I hold the urge to interrupt with the answer |
